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Old 07-10-2012, 04:33 PM   #1
Mr.Efra
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Star Man Mr.Efra and the secret of Family Western...

I will love that you posts your comments about this original story i┤m making here for you and if u want to join say it.
__________________________________________________ ____
Chapter 1-Meeting the new person.

Narrator:
It was a new world for Flipside and for all Mushroom Kingdom and the rest of the World, TIppi has just being an human again with Count Bleck, now he is named Count "Blumiere", his minions were the same, Mimi and the O┤Chunks, but beside, was another..Mr.Efra, he was no bad anymore, but he wanted to destroy secretly the evil slowly....but Mimi had been disctracted and O┤Chunks too, so now he will count on the new minion Mr.Efra...MR. Efra is young counting at the age of O┤Chunks or Mimi, because he only have 15 years, but he is neutral, it can be a hero, or it can be evil, but secretly, he become for the family on Mushroom KingdomWestern, the "Westerns" where a family with bad past, all the human generations (all were humans) has evil aura, but the 80% of them where heroes....the fathers of Mr.Efra give him on adoption with ehr sister too....they keep the both of them cool and the age of 5 the both meet Tippi and she addopted them...Count Blumiere teach how to fight each one....

Day 8/06/2012

Tippi: Efraaaa! Tinaaaaaaa!..Come to eat sweethearts!

Mimi: Hey Tippi, and me what? I wanna eat before see Goomba Bros Unleashed!

O Chunks: Yeee, and wat for the uncle CHunks eeh?

Tippi: Teh heh, come on guys you too can eat...

Mimi: Wooo, O chunks you can speak better! *laught*

O Chunks: O shut up you greenie rat!

Tippi: Come on guys dont speak like that on my house!...

Tina: Mommy im here!! *sits dow* Hi uncle Chunks and Mimi!!

Count Blumiere: Điejeje hi hunny i came

Tippi: [B]Hi hunny come to eat please, but before, ┐you haave not see Efra?[/B

Narrator: Efra was in the school, he was no going home so early, some guys from his class stopped him and where punching him, he can┤t defend his self versus 3....but a dark aura where surging in that battle that it was loosing...

Guy 1: Come on you masked stupid man...┐ what will you do, cry? *laught*

Guy 2: Left him guys, we give our greatist hit on him...

Guy 3: Đieejejee Efra u suck.

Efra: *hurt in the floor* Godammit...you will pay..i feel it! YOU WILL PAY..

Guy 1: Ohhh you say we will pay? What a dumb you are...

Efra: i will use my hammer to beat u...you rats!

Narrator: They never noticed that he always keep a hammer on his backpag, but he was smart to not let them know...he with angry grabbed his hammer on the backpag and punch the first guy in the stomach, he jumps punching in the face on the second with the left hand(he have the hammer on the right one) then spin punching with the hammer the three of them and lefting them on K.O. seeing stars on his head...

Efra: Now is another reason to extinct evil
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Old 07-10-2012, 05:42 PM   #2
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Old 07-10-2012, 08:49 PM   #3
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Thanks buddy AlloftheAbove, if u want ur character on the story let me know his name, powers and that stuff
__________________________________________________ __________
Chapter 2: Family talk.

Narrator:
Efra go slowly to his house, it was thinking, why he is living with their parents, but they dont look a lot to him or like Tina? Is kinda strange to be son of someone that you doesn┤t identify, well Tina identify on the blue and beautiful eyes like TIppi, but in the other ways, they where so diferent...At be in home, all say hello to him, but Tippi discover a purple thing on his cheek...

Tina: That idiost punch you again bro?

Tippi: Efra, someone punch you dear? o.o

O┤Chunks: Hey Efra cousing, just say me who and i kick them down!! Haha!

Mimi: And i help the no brained uncle O┤Chunks to piss them down teh heh..

O┤Chunks: Mimi just shut up that mouth!...And...that costume you use Efra, is remembering me to that Mr.L guy, just that you are in blue...and have and E, and u are a little weakness and..

Efra: OH CAN YOU ALL SHUT UP!!? ITS MAH PROBLEMS!! I dont wanna eat! *run away to his room*

Mimi, Count Blumiere, Tippi and Tina: *all see O┤Chunks* ČČ You screwed up man!

O┤Chunks: [B]OH...please! :s/B]

Narrator:
Efra was really really sad, ┐how was possible that he didn┤t win too right a battle? His "father" win few battles, Mimi and O chunks too, and few Tippi too, and her sister was better in magic fighting but, all was better than him, ┐why he suck?What he need to be stronger? He had good feelings...he must discover how to be stronger..but how?...

Count Blumiere:*enter to his room* Son, are you Ok?

Efra: NO! Im not OK! im a good student to this cool and strange Universe but godammit! I can┤t win for 100% a battle! Everytime i fight i get more hurted than others!

Count Blumiere:*enter to his room* Son,the fighting are not good at 100%, is better talk than fight, and ┐how i know this? Because i was like you, in certain way obviously..

Efra: Promise me something...Promise me i will kick ass, or atleast i can defend my self better, Promise me father, promise me!!

Count Blumiere: ...........Ok........promised..........son.

__________________________________________________ __

Chapter 3: The practice.

Narrator: The next day, Blumiere talk about the situation about Efra to Tippi and O┤Chunks....because Mimi where with Efra because he must present one of the family that make something incredible, Ochunks was sleep so he get with Mimi to school, Blumiere where thinking a in all the way to the practiceto get new skills to his son...by the side, O Chunks and Mimi was not really the family but at being the best friends of the Count, they become legally to be their family.

Day 09/06/2012

Teacher: For finishing the class, Efra, what you got ot the class?

Efra:Well my aunt MImi is here, he know certain magic thinks.

Mimi: Thats me...MIMIIIIIIIII..

Efra:*]facepalm* She is only "19 or 20" but she is like a 5 young child...wellshe is...

Mimi: *laught* What a cute think....Well all..*put in the center of all the students* wanna see something?

All: Yeah! Do it!

Narrator: Mimi appears million of thinks made of Ruupes of Nowhere, Tina where the first on clapping, and the rest at the begginning just smile but later clapped, the Teacher get him a 10 to his calification....In the rest of the class, Mimi was saying jokes to Efra and Tina and some of helping on their work..At the exit they go home and eat hamburguers with all "the family" on house....and in the afternoon at 3:00 P.M. Blumiere get on the garden with Efra, and make him appear with him, in a special arena maded by him...it was full of enemy and stages...

Efra: Wooooooo! Can I start?

Narrator:
Every step on the ground was repleted with enemies made of aura, Efra defeated in 2 hours 100 enemies, of course he got tired, and Blumiere let him rest with fresh water and some apples while talking about school, but he continue another hour defeating 10 enemeis more, he use his punches and hammer, he felt great, but something big appear, it was a giant dragon......that at see Efra, put out of his mouth fire that he dodge jumping, Blumiere where so far to help him, but no for hate him, it was far because he know hsi son can defeat the dragon..

Efra: *running*Godammit fahter! How i can beat this dragon!! Waaaaaa!

Dragon: *running beside him * I will defeat u WEAKLNESS!

Narrator: "Wealkness" it was so insulting for the teenage, so he get angry and jump to the dragon, and jumps to his head again and do a "stomp" on his head, putting his shoes on the head of the dragon to impulse him to jump and put out of his back hsi hammer to prepare an attack with full power, and he do it, he do a "down" hammer attack on the dragon head to make him dizzy and get down of him, he started doing hammer attacks to the feets and stomach of the dragon, but the dragon get angry too, so do a stron attack to Efra making him fly over and get on the floor....

Count Blumiere: *serious* Is all son? IS ALL? You were solicitating this for only do fool things?...You can do it son!!

Dragon: No he can┤t!

Efra: grrr...I...I....W...will defeat you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Narrator: Efra with good decision on his dreams and his goals, he jump over the floor and with all his maximus attack he do, attack the draggon doing a 360░ attack on his cheek and then a up and down attack doing a combo on the cheek of the dragon like 10 times, a combo of 10, the draggon dissapear and the Count heal his son and hug him...

Count Blumiere: Well done....son.
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Old 07-11-2012, 08:49 PM   #4
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One thing before, my character is different than me, im doing my character history, this characters (Efra and Tina) and the story is original
__________________________________________________ ____________
Chapter 4: Tina and temple of Shadows. Part1.
Narrator: The next days on school were so strange talking about Tina, she was so serious this time...and usually she is energetic and everyday trying to get someone better or telling jokes, but the 2 weeks that passed she was rejecting all, only she sayed hi, goodbye and other things like that stuff, something was bad with her, but how to know?
One day on exit of school....

Day 23/06/2012

Bad-Ass girls: Wooo is tina, the rare human being ahahaa

Tina: Shut up morons.....

Bad-Ass girls: Morons!?.....GRR..YOU ARE DEAD You spocky girl!!

Narrator: Those Bad ass girls where like 5 and togueter get fighting with Tina, Tina received all the punches for bein alot of them, Efra that was so long get running into the bad ass girls and punch out them with a only 1 hammer attack,getting them in K.O., they were exit school so the teachers will not punish him atleast......

Efra: Are you ok sis?

Tina: Yeah..thanks dude...

Efra: Tina, what is it?...Why are you acting...rare?

Tina: IS NOT OF YOUR DAMMIT BUSINESS!...YOU GET IT PUNK?

Efra: Tina, Tina !!

Narrator:
Tina went home alone, or atleast, that make think to Efra, that he go home with peace but at enter only know that she was not there, Tina had the thing about put the backpag on the chair again, he just run away (Efra) to search her, with his mask and hammer, he run to all the streets, enter to all the houses but, nothing, only one place he didn┤t check, teh Temple of Darkness a prohibited place, ┐Tina was there? Yeah, in efective she was. Efra saw her while running into the path of the Temple of Darkness, he run after her and both were in the temple, he grabbed her and she keep her eyes looking the door of the entrance and they were trapped in the Temple.
Tina: WHY THE HELL YOU CAME!?WE ARE TRAPPED NOW! I WANTED DISCOVER WHAT IS HERE ALOOOOONE!
Efra: Tina, im here, nothing will hurt you...
Tina: [B]You are weakless! OK!? YOU NEVER WILL BE STRONGER FOR EVIL![B]
Efra: Tina, I was training days and hours! so you are not saying the things correctly!? OK!? And why you came?...
Tina: Here┤s secret magic that surely i will need in the future to beat more stronger enemies

Narrator: Tina continues the path of where they were witouth caring about Efra, but he continues beside her...

Efra: You are a beutiful cheek and you are stronger, what more you want?
Tina: [B]Honor dear bro...Honor....[B]
Efra: We have the honor, so dont bless me..
Tina: Oh just shut up!!...
Narrator: IN that moment some of the ground get open, getting Tina grabbed of a piece of rocks, that broke in seconds but Efra grabbed her hands and she keep alive until he mantain grabbing her....
Efra: Hang on sis!!...IM HERE!
Tina: *blushed* GO AWAY!...Im a looser!..
Efra: You shut up instead! You are a good mage like dad! You are beautiful and you are the one i love more like mom, father, Mimi and O┤Chunks, hang on please!!
Tina: *blushed and crying* Save me please bro!..
Narrator:
Tina was in serious problems, under her was only water, she never learned to swim, so she was in danger, Efra was hanging her with all his strength but serious monsters made of black aura were appearing, and new problems were there.....the enemies, the river, the exit closed....┐What should they do?
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Old 07-13-2012, 11:47 PM   #5
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wow thats a nice story
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Old 07-14-2012, 07:11 PM   #6
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Chapter 5: The appearence of the swordman "ElBootho"
Narrator: For Tina it was the seconds on count, Efra woull be hurt by the enemys and she will fall to the river to her "Game-Over" orappear on the "Other-Where" or the "Under-Where", or atleast she was thinking in that, how sad end like that, Efra maybe would be defeated by the shadows things and go too to the "Game-Over" or appear on the "Other-Where". But by their luck, a swordman in green with a strange hat on his head and brwon head cut the enemies and help Efra to put safe Tina without saying a word, Tina inmeediattly hugs her brother and he hugs her, the two started to cry, it was like their life where started again...or atleast both feel like that...

Tina: *crying*Brother forgive me for that bad things I sayed to you..I love you, I love you so much! TT-TT...Im so sorry pelase forgive me im a bad girl im the baddest in the world *hugging him strongly*

Efra:*hugging her crying too* No, you please forgive me, we are twins but, I must protect you, I must teach you like my parents that bad things are really bad!....Im not a good brother....im just wekness like you say...please sis don┤t scare me again like that please...
???:Hey you, the both, ┐what the hell where you thinking when you came here eh?:

Tina: *separates from his brother and put besides alittle blushed* Well mister, I was here for see the mistery of this Temple, it seems like rare that anyone talks abouth the Temple so I figurate that must be hide a secret....
ElBootho:MR?..Im 18 scary-girl...and I┤m a swordman and you can say me "ElBootho" that investigate the mistery too, what about go in group?

Tina: That┤s interesting idea, lets going Bootho! n_n
Efra:What the damn of the damnes...You are 18 years old and you say,that we must be in group in this strange, creepy and unknow Temple? [/COLOR]

[COLOR="SeaGreen"]ElBootho:Yeah, ┐so?Come on, it would be a great adventure..
Efra: Mm...Good point, I accept!
Narrator:
Joining in the group of ElBootho, the two twins get in the adventure with the swordman, Tina with her magic tricks and Efra with attacks with hammer, punches and kicks.The swordman while walking to the only path in that sector cut the shadows in two with horizontal attacks and with frontal attacks too. Efra was defeating enemies with his hammer and doing punch combos, like punching in head, stomach and then a 360░ spin using his foot on his face, and Tina with black magic, every step they were going where more enemies, so in the mayority of the time of battle, ElBootho used his spin attack using the sword and with jumping and cutting in half the shadows, where easy for him, for Efra usoing his hammer to make them see stars very hurted and do fast combos were the best choice, or atleast, for him, and the mayority of the magic that Tina used, were the White Magic, using Light, thunder, ice and sometimes fire, it was like their adventure...has begon..┐.or no?
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Old 07-16-2012, 05:40 PM   #7
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Chapter 6: The Shadow Princess. Part 1.
Narrator:
"ElBootho" gets cutting all the shadows they were crossing over and that, but Efra get in the action too, punching with the knuckles and with the hammer that he haved, Tina the black magic she had was only ice and light powers, like a cut ,ale of a light sword or ice objects that she taked it and use it at her using. Well, the three warriors get in trouble at the second room, because were enterely with in different forms, it was like mens, goombas, koopas, spikes, demons, and well, rare things made of stones and black aura.
But well, it was kinda different as other shadows,they were only seeing their eyes, contempling the new humans on the Temple, and in the area it was sounding something strange....it was sounding this words in an slowly angelical words: "Who are you?..Why you came dears?.....You came to see your princess....?...Welcome..."
They were a little scared but continue walking, and then they see an ending, it was a door, but was locked...

Tina: Great we are screwed, now what we can do?
ElBootho: Is so strange, that shadows keep looking...maybe..they are my fans!
Efra: God, they are no fans! they are strange shadows from here and is obvious they wanna make us our "Game Over", but they are expecting to not get mad at them to defat us..
ElBootho: That is what she say...
Tina: Ahahaha xDD

Narrator: But the shadows at least get what Efra say, or well, at least they appear that, the shadows came so slowly to them, slowly and patiently, Efra, Tina and "ElBootho" want to unlock the door but neither their arms put out that lock, well, as anything to do, they must attack,┐don┤t you think?, the y attack, Tina attack putting ice to the floor to freeze the shadows and in that moment Efra attacked the shadow using all his strength with the hammer and "ElBootho" using a B. Swing Attack (BSA), an special attack from his imagination and magic, the sword get lightly and he make a spin attack cutting the most enemies possible to do a swing like if his weapon was a bat, well, "he swing the enemy", they continue and continue until a scream stopped them: "Waaa!!..┐Why are you doing this?Enter to please me and help me but don't kill my citizens......don't kill them or defeat them!!".
The door were like a "boom" when explodes it,the group enter inside to see who or what was doing that rare things.
It was like a room, a pretty room for a girl, but made of dark, the bed was black, the photos were a blue-haired pretty girl, and the crowns and things in black....there was a sexy shadow on the bed....that soon get up and were the same sexy blue-haired girl of the photos....
Efra: W...W..*blushed*Woo..you are the most gorgeous girl in the world...
???: Thanks guy with black mask...teh heh, you are so rare, but you have inside something I want...
ElBootho: Wo, wo, wo, ┐what about me? Im a good swordman, a great of greatest lady ahaha!
???: Thanks, maybe I consider you on my Kingdom...but...I need the magic girl and the rare guy souls...
Tina: WAAAAAA! She wanna kill us bro!
Efra: I dont think so sis, right pretty girl?
???: *Put out a knife on her hair*...teh heh...
Efra: Iwas wrong...o_o
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Old 07-16-2012, 07:59 PM   #8
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Old 07-17-2012, 08:25 AM   #9
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I would really appreciate it if you could somehow incorporate chicken art into this story.
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Old 07-17-2012, 04:10 PM   #10
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OFF: I will draw the scenes at end of the first season of the history
__________________________________________________ _____________
Chapter 7: The Shadow Princess. Part 2: The Darkness awaking...

???: Just you don┤t know?...Your heart have....evil.....and I┤m the evil princess....
Efra:Shut up! You just wanna have our souls!!
???: You are cute in not accepting..but im getting tired of repeating the same..*getting mad and evil and dark aura appears in all her body* You wanna get it in the bad or in the good form?
Efra:*show his hammer* Bring it up!
ElBootho: *put infronts of Efra* Just you don┤t have enought power for her evil....i will defeat her..
Tina: B...But..
ElBootho: But nothing, just RUN!
Efra:I help ya!
ElBootho: I say....RUN!!
Efra:...........*smiles*.....Gotcha...
Tina: Is our new friend and u wanna leave him alone with this killer!..Efra you..
Efra:He can do it, is stronger....
Princess Konata: Ohh...what a sweety you are...but...i will not let you go..you know?...By the way, im Princess Konata..meet the darkness...teh heh....
ElBootho: Come on chick, get it on!!

Narrator: While Efra and Tina was running to find a exit for run away and then help "ElBootho", "ElBootho" was in battle. The swordman intented to attack with vertical attacks and horizontal attacks in her face, stomach and legs, but the "princess" just smiling apart of his attacks with lightly, it was like she was reading his attacks, ElBootho was like: "How is possible this chick flee of my attacks!?"

ElBootho: Come on attack me you coward!!
Princess Konata: Ohh...is very funny, im like dancing you know, teh heh, continue with the class dance master, continue! =3
ElBootho: Grr...Don't laugh of me!!!!!!

Narrator: As "ElBootho" intented to get hurted the princess, she was smiling, laughing and flee of all atacks as if was a dance class....it was amazing flee of all the attacks, but something on the head of ElBootho have a occurrence..."What about do a light attack combined with all my magic?! Sure will function!"
ElBootho: *stopping* Ok you creepy girl...lets finish this....grrr....*start appearing a light aura in his sword and legs*
Princess Konata: I was loving dancing,┐why you stopped? *sad*
ElBootho: Because i will put you the Game Over....Grra!!!

Narrator: "ElBootho" put the sword on her stomach, she was hurted now, and a dense light was hurting her more putting her blooding lightly, but she was no screaming, only she was like in shock, after that ElBootho take out the sword and do a spin attack with aura on his stomach, then horizontal attacks in same place and vertical attacks in all her body, she was blooding, but lightly, ┐why she was blooding lightly?; Anyway ElBootho do a 35 combo-attack putting in and out of her stomach her sword with light aura and the same spin attacks and for the final, he swing her as like batting on a baseball game but with a combination of: Fire,Light, Ice and Water exploted in the impact of her stomach and get flying away, ElBootho follow her, jumped, do a 5 combo attack in the air for do swinging on the air hurting her with Fire and Light while they were in the air, and for the final, she was in the floor very hurted with the same shocking face and ElBootho put his sword on his stomach with all her force exploting all the room....Efra and Tina hear the explotion, but they continue running on the first two areas that they went searching an exit....

In the room
ElBootho: Uf...Kinda hard...hehehe....im..cool...
Princess Konata: *get up on the floor and see all the room in destruction, get angry* MY ROOOOOOOOM!!!
ElBootho: WHAT THE....NO..YOU JUST...
Princess Konata: JUST YOU THINK BECAAUSE YOU ARE IN THE PART OF LIGHT YOU WOULD DEFEAT ME?! YOU ARE WROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG!! I WILL MAY YOU PAY FOR MY ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!

Narrator: With all the dark aura you can imagine, the princess do a black laser beam made of Darkness, Water, Light and in the same way, spirits, yeah, as you hear, spirits, all combined form the laser beam that make ElBootho get, in graves hurting in all his body, he just after the beam, he see himself to see him dying slowly....but the Princess cure all his hurts by black magic, but put it on ice and she with a sword made of aura, do the same combos that he do to her, and final she clap and he get in serious hurts again putting him quickly in K.O., that she recover him but putting into a jail.

Princess Konata: [B]Mm...where is my minions...Mm...sure they are looking my castle..Wiii! I WILL find them *start searching efraand tina singing* lalala[B]

Last edited by Mr.Efra; 07-17-2012 at 04:42 PM.
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