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Old 08-28-2008, 09:53 AM   #1
Spirit
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Star Man 10 things GOD won't ask you.

1...God wonŽt ask what kind of car you drove;
HeŽll ask how many people you drove who didnŽt have transportation.

2...God wonŽt ask the square footage of your house,
HeŽll ask how many people you welcomed into your home.

3...God wonŽt ask about the clothes you had in your closet,
HeŽll ask how many you helped to clothe.

4...God wonŽt ask what your highest salary was,
HeŽll ask if you compromised your character to obtain it.

5...God wonŽt ask what your job title was,
HeŽll ask if you performed your job to the best of your ability.

6...God wonŽt ask how many friends you had,
HeŽll ask how many people to whom you were a friend.

7...God wonŽt ask in what neighborhood you lived,
HeŽll ask how you treated your neighbors.

8...God wonŽt ask about the color of your skin,
HeŽll ask about the content of your character.

9...God wonŽt ask why it took you so long to seek Salvation,
HeŽll lovingly take you to your mansion in heaven, and not to the gates of Hell.

10...God wonŽt ask how many people you forwarded this to,
HeŽll ask if you were ashamed to pass it on to your friends.
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Old 08-28-2008, 10:52 AM   #2
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Old 08-28-2008, 02:12 PM   #3
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1...God wonŽt ask what kind of car you drove;
In fact, he doesn't even care if it pollutes the crap out of the world you live in...

2...God wonŽt ask the square footage of your house,
But will ask that you donate money to his house...

3...God wonŽt ask about the clothes you had in your closet,
Unless they're too revealing, or suggest opposing viewpoints, then they're considered slutty or heretical.

4...God wonŽt ask what your highest salary was,
Just that you donate ten percent of it.

5...God wonŽt ask what your job title was,
Unless you work at a Planned Parenthood. Then you're screwed.

6...God wonŽt ask how many friends you had,
Just how many you told about him. In detail. Against their wishes.

7...God wonŽt ask in what neighborhood you lived,
Mainly because he doesn't care. Especially if that neighborhood is in a third world country. Or Detroit.

8...God wonŽt ask about the color of your skin,
Just about your sexual orientation. Or your gender. Or your religion. Or if you use contraceptives.

9...God wonŽt ask why it took you so long to seek Salvation,
He'll just condemn you to eternal pain and hellfire if you don't get there.

10...God wonŽt ask how many people you forwarded this to,
Because he didn't write it. Or endorse it. Or have any say in it.
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Old 08-28-2008, 02:15 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ender View Post
1...God wonŽt ask what kind of car you drove;
In fact, he doesn't even care if it pollutes the crap out of the world you live in...

2...God wonŽt ask the square footage of your house,
But will ask that you donate money to his house...

3...God wonŽt ask about the clothes you had in your closet,
Unless they're too revealing, or suggest opposing viewpoints, then they're considered slutty or heretical.

4...God wonŽt ask what your highest salary was,
Just that you donate ten percent of it.

5...God wonŽt ask what your job title was,
Unless you work at a Planned Parenthood. Then you're screwed.

6...God wonŽt ask how many friends you had,
Just how many you told about him. In detail. Against their wishes.

7...God wonŽt ask in what neighborhood you lived,
Mainly because he doesn't care. Especially if that neighborhood is in a third world country. Or Detroit.

8...God wonŽt ask about the color of your skin,
Just about your sexual orientation. Or your gender. Or your religion. Or if you use contraceptives.

9...God wonŽt ask why it took you so long to seek Salvation,
He'll just condemn you to eternal pain and hellfire if you don't get there.

10...God wonŽt ask how many people you forwarded this to,
Because he didn't write it. Or endorse it. Or have any say in it.
I like this one better. Way too hilarious, man.

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Old 08-28-2008, 02:18 PM   #5
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Lol, Nice Ender... Spirit, Those are good things that god wouldnt and would ask
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And like a newborn baby
Don't be afraid to crawl
And remember when you walk
Sometimes we fall...so
Fall on Jesus
Fall on Jesus
Fall on Jesus and live!
- Untitled Hymn (Come To Jesus) -
-Chris Rice-
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Old 08-28-2008, 05:59 PM   #6
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Ender is 100% true on numbers 2 and 4
but what sprit posted does have alot of meaning.
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Old 08-28-2008, 06:01 PM   #7
Tencade Kazarian
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Old 08-28-2008, 07:00 PM   #8
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11... God doesn't ask you how the newest Harry Potter book is,
instead he asks if you found out already that
Spoiler
Snape kills Dumbledore...
WAIT, WHAT? AW MAN GOD, NOT COOL!!!

Last edited by Dr. Jekyll; 08-28-2008 at 07:02 PM.
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Old 08-29-2008, 12:16 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Jekyll View Post
11... God doesn't ask you how the newest Harry Potter book is,
instead he asks if you found out already that
Spoiler
Snape kills Dumbledore...
WAIT, WHAT? AW MAN GOD, NOT COOL!!!
Oh, yeah, I forgot that one.

There's a number 11 on my list...LOL.
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Old 08-29-2008, 12:18 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ender View Post
Oh, yeah, I forgot that one.

There's a number 11 on my list...LOL.
:O Do you believe in god?
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And like a newborn baby
Don't be afraid to crawl
And remember when you walk
Sometimes we fall...so
Fall on Jesus
Fall on Jesus
Fall on Jesus and live!
- Untitled Hymn (Come To Jesus) -
-Chris Rice-
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