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Old 05-13-2013, 09:34 PM   #1
SuperGamecube64
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A rant about a "friend"

Just so you know, this is totally unimportant and has nothing to do with NFF. This was just on my mind, and I need to vent, so I'm posting it here.

As for this "friend" in question, we have known one another for almost literally our whole lives. We first met when we were only 3 or 4 because our mothers happened to be friends. Although our interactions were quite limited for years, I coincidentally wound up going to the same high school as him. This school, as some of you are already aware, was a Christian school. If you don't know for some odd reason, that means the school was, obviously, in affiliation with the christian faith, and our school was indeed also a church. Through those 4 years, we got a chance to really form a friendship that we couldn't as kids. Even after he graduated (he actually graduated early), we kept in touch. As it turns out, this friend is actually gay. He never said anything of the sort until halfway through college, and never said it to me at all - I found out via mutual friends. However, I knew he was gay anyway. The news didn't surprise me in any way, because I'd already figured it out long ago. Well, he began cutting ties with a lot of people from the school. Can't say I blame him, as most Christians are in opposition to homosexuality. However, why he chose to cut ties with me - rather abruptly I might add, I just can't figure out. Yet, he till maintains ties with one single school mate of ours. I'm outright offended that he thinks I would not accept him. I bothers me to no end that he thinks it should be ok to just forget about our friendship. It feels like a great big "**** you!" and I just can't piece it together. He removed me on facebook, and all that jazz, and at first I thought it was accidental and resent a friend request. He never replied to it. I sent him a message explaining that I knew he was gay, and that I didn't care, and that I still cared about him just the same. No response. I even got his phone number from the girl he is in contact with, but when I tried to talk to him, he didn't reply - though he did send her a message angry that she gave me his number.

I'm not sure where to go with this from here. Do I just say **** him and forget about it? It seems arbitrary to attempt any form of communication with him. I try not to hold it against him, but at the same time it just makes me furious. Why are you going to throw away a nearly 20 year long friendship because you like dick?
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Old 05-13-2013, 10:12 PM   #2
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Just let it go. If he doesn't want to be friends right now, just let him be. He'll get back in touch if/when he gets more comfortable in his openness if he wants to. You can't force someone to be friends with you.
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Old 05-14-2013, 09:52 AM   #3
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Yeah, I would give him his space right now. Maybe in a year or two he may change his mind, and if he doesn't... His loss.
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Old 05-14-2013, 10:00 AM   #4
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If you already let him know that you accept him and he still doesn't respond, then just let him do his thing first. If he doesn't respond then yeah, like Mario said. His loss.
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Old 05-14-2013, 11:37 AM   #5
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Have you ever maybe said some things in the past like made an untasteful gay joke (before you knew he was gay) or something like that? Often times, people will look back at the past and become angry about it. Maybe something you said about gays in the past before you knew he was gay has retroactiely offended him and he feels you can't accept it?....that's the only thing I can think of.

If he's just come out of the closet this is likely a very dark and confusing time for him, he doesn't know who he can trust. All you can do is hope he comes back to his senses, eventually.
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Old 05-14-2013, 04:00 PM   #6
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I'd leave it be. I'm going to be slightly stereotypical now, but hopefully not in the offensive way. I've had quite a few gay friends, and every single one of them was very stubborn and dramatic. Obviously it isn't a definite personality of someone who's gay; but I'm saying it MIGHT be one of those traits which is making him refuse to answer you. Coincidentally, out of the 4 gay people I've had a dispute with, none of them spoke to me ever again afterwards. None of them wanted to forgive and forget.

So yeah, again; not saying this is all gay people.
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Old 05-20-2013, 05:24 AM   #7
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I will say that Konata is right about almost all the gay people i ever met. The men anyway. Lesbians tend to be a different story. But gay men, oh yeah. Im afraid most are drama queens, they tend to not think with a level head most of the time. They have all the emotion of a female and issues on top of that. Its a scary combination.

As far as your situation, consider what you already said. If it makes you this angry and you feel this wronged by it, its not just you. It really is that offensive and it should piss you off. A big **** you, is exactly what it is and i wouldnt stand for it. Not everybody is a good person man. Some people care and some care as long as it serves a purpose at the time.. Just because your gay, it dosent give you a free pass or make you special. I think thats what im tired of the most. Its like people using the black thing as cover to do whatever they want. Or not being able to say anything about a person thats crooked, just because they are a jew... There is a reason these things started being said to begin with. I think people tend to forget that.
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Old 05-26-2013, 07:21 PM   #8
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Man, take it easy, ┐do you like him like friend very much, dont you?, if he was like you(like u like real friend) he would try to find you.Now think, ┐dont you thought that he Ędissapeared for both wellĘ?, maybe he had very problems that making him thinking about dissapear,(homo people are kind but with 89 percent of social and family problems).Is not ur fault bro
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Old 05-27-2013, 12:23 AM   #9
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I agree with mostly what was said here. Just leave it be, he will come around if he wants to be friends again, maybe after he sorts things out. If he doesn't, then he wasn't a good friend to begin with. You're not at fault here, since you explained that you still cared for your friendship.
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