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Old 07-10-2013, 03:14 AM   #1
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A while back I started writing a story called Immortal, and posting it here. A lot of you really liked it, but I never got the chance to finish it. I am currently rewriting it. Here's the prologue, enjoy. The prologue is fairly vague about thins, so if you have any questions, you're free to ask. You'll more than likely get your answer eventually either way, however.

Immortal: Prologue

At the top of a decrepit and forsaken tower, there sat a large statured man dressed in plush, red, royal garb, a crown resting atop his head, between the horns of a deer skull mask. His eyes were glowing a haunting ghostly blue. The structure's roof has been destroyed, and the snow fell around him, covering most of the room's dirty, cracked floors with a white, frozen carpet.

From out of a double door a small, but well structures man walked through, wearing light protective armor that was quite worn. He had a noticeable hand guard with a large reaver on his index and ring knuckles that he wore on his left hand. With his right, he drew out a longsword that gleamed in the small amount of sunlight that broke through the clouds. He looked at the man sitting on the thrown, only a single blue eye visible in the veil of his hood.
“You've chased me far, Fenris...” the demonic man said as he stood from the worn out old throne.

“A king? You've really done such a thing to a the king of the Ainsley?” the hooded man, Fenris, said angrily.

“Haven't we been over this before? As long as I continue to provide souls for him, Thanatos will leave me be...if I cease to provide them, I'll be reaped like the others! I don't care who or what I use, status means nothing to me...” the possessed king retorted.

“You're just a coward running from your own fate. The reaper has you on a leash!”

“Why not take a walk in my shoes?” the impostor grinned as he drew a two handed sword, easily twice the length of Fenris'.

The two both dashed towards one another, clashing blades several times repeatedly before taking a step back. It was only a moment before they went at it again. They found themselves locked in a power struggle, pushing the midsections of their blades against one another. The impostor king’s long blade slid down the length of Fenris', and as the tip neared him, Fenris jumped back to escape it. As he did, a small, shining crystal on a tattered string flowed out of his shirt, and the string was cut by the sword. As it hit the ground, the crystal shattered with a resonating echo.

“So that's why it wouldn't work before...” the demon said interestingly, having had a major revelation.

“This isn't good...” Fenris thought to himself as the enemy’s body went limp, dropping his weapon. In its place floated a blue sphere of light that rushed at Fenris and entered his body. Fenris convulsed as he screamed painfully, soon falling to his hands and knees. In a moment, he was no longer within his own body, but instead stared himself down. His body had been stolen, and its eyes glowing the same ghastly blue as the king he had just battled.

“I think he'll be most pleased with this one! Perhaps he'll even give me a break when he catches you!” The impostor laughed, now within Fenris’ body.

Before he was fully aware of what was happening, a portal ripped open behind Fenris, and dragged him inside. He was soon plummeting thousands of feet before finally landing in a large body of water. He swiftly swam to the surface and pulled himself onto dry land, observing his surroundings. The weather was cloudy wherever he was, and the land was mountainous, not to mention barren.

“So it was you making all of that fuss?” called a female voice.

Fenris shuffled around quickly, finding what appeared to be a human girl in the water. She had flowing blond hair and very fair skin.

“Where am I?!” Fenris demanded to know, almost as if he had some right to demand anything of this woman.

“The spirit appears you've suffered an untimely fate?”

“You could say that...”

“Well, if you can escape the spirit world, there is a chance you can return to your former life...but that isn't easy for your kind. You aren't supposed to be roaming freely here. Thanatos won't have it.” The woman chuckled. She appeared to have fangs when she grinned.

“Just point me in the right direction.” Fenris asked, unamused.

“Head west, and convince the Gorgons to give you further instructions...but I warn you they aren't as friendly as us Mermaids...” the girl said splashing with her large blue tail-fin.

“Would it help if I old them you sent me?

“Hah! That's likely to get you eaten without a thought!...although that's already a possibility as is...”

“How comforting…thanks for the advice, I think.” Fenris sighed as he went on his way.

Originally Posted by Brandyn View Post
You wield the banhammer like Thor wields Mjolnir.

"No, you're clearly wrong. A game's success is determined by the score. Opinions are facts now, and if this game gets too many negative facts then this game clearly sucks so we should all just leave and play Kingdom Hearts and Call of Duty.(that hurt to type)" - Sabeta_Sama of GFAQs
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