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|01-30-2009, 06:18 PM||#1|
The NEET Thing To Do
Just been browsing the internet and found this really funny thing about different types of shits lmao.
That's the kind where you feel the shit come out, have shit on the toilet paper, but there is no shit in the toilet.
The kind where you shit it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper.
Second Wave Shit
It happens when you're done shitting, you've pulled your pants up to your knees, and you realise that you have to shit some more.
Brain Hemorrage Shit
Also known as "Pop a vein in your forehead " shit. the kind where you strain so much to get it out that you practically have a stroke.
The kind of shit that is so huge that you're afraid to flush the toilet without breaking it into a few pieces with your toilet brush
That is the kind of shit that you have the morning after a long night of drinking - its most noticeable trait is the skid marks left on the bottom of the toilet .
"Gee I wish I could shit" shit
Its the kind of shit where you want to shit, but all you do is sit on the toilet with cramps and fart a few times.
Spinal Tap Shit
That's the one where it hurts so much coming out that you swear it was leaving you sideways.
Wet Cheeks Shit Also known as "The Power dump"
That's the kind that comes out of your ass so fast that your butt cheeks get splashed with the toilet water.
The kind where yellowish-brown liquid shoots out of your butt, spashes all over the inside of the toilet bowl and, at the same time, chronically burns your tender poop-chute.
Mexican Food Shit
A class all its own
The Crowd Pleaser
This shit is so intriguing in size and/or appearance that you have to show it to someone.
This shit occurs after a lengthy period of constipation, allowing you to be your old self again.
This shit occurs at the same time time each day and is accomplished with the aid of a newspaper
Guiness Book of Records Shit
A shit so noteworthy it should be recorded for future generations
The aftershock shit
This shit has an odor so powerful that anyone entering the vicinity within the next 7 hours is effected.
The Honeymoons over shit
This is any shit created in the presence of another person.
Ashit so huge it cannot exit without vocal assistance
Characterized by its floatability, this shit has been known to resurface after many flushes
A shit which refuses to let go. It is usually necessary to engage in a rocking or bouncing motion, but quite often the only solution is to push it away with a small piece of toilet paper
This appears in the toilet mysteriously and no one will admit putting it there
Now you see it, now you don't. this shit is playing games with you. Requires patience and muscle control
A shit that comes as a complete surprise at a time that is either inappropriate to shit (i.e. during love making or a root canal) or you are nowhere near shitting facilities.
A long skinny shit which has managed to coil into a frightening position - usually harmless Olympic Shit This shit occurs exactly one hour prior to the start of any competitive event in which you are entered and bears a close resemblance to the Drinkers shit.
|01-30-2009, 06:41 PM||#3|
The Anthrax Envelope
OMFG!! LMMFAO IM LAUGHING SO MUCH, THAT MY TEARS ARE COMING OUT!!!!!! I HADN'T LAUGHED LIKE THAT IN YEARS!! LMFAO!!! xD
|01-30-2009, 06:42 PM||#4|
The NEET Thing To Do
If you guys like stuff like this i suppose i could post up some of my guides, maybe, i'd have to type them up again xD.
|02-04-2009, 07:46 PM||#7|
You forgot one!!!!
Casper the Friendly Compost:
When all you have to eat or drink for 24 hours is a Pina Colada, when you take a dump, it will be pure white colored.
Maddox's Alphabet of Manliness FTMFW!
|02-08-2009, 10:52 PM||#9|
Don't mess wif him
I am far too superior to smile, let alone laugh at poop jokes.
I hate phantom shits, BTW.
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